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Does The New Generation Of Man Know How To Court?

We asked 5 single women ages 17, 23, 28, 35 and 42 this question about the new culture of men. Check Out What They Each Said!

"Dating is usually about meeting a selfish need. Courting is about intentionally building a foundation for marriage."

Kaylena 17- "Hahaa...Hmm, I don't think I even know what courting is. Probably the closest thing to that I know is a guy taking me to dinner and a movie, hanging out at his place or mine, maybe going for a walk, and him inviting me to his ball games. I kinda wish it was like in the TV shows and movies where the guy takes a girl on super fun dates and gets her flowers or something. I just have not experienced that yet. I'm hopeful there are good-looking good guys like that out there though. I'm sure there are exciting date ideas that don't cost a lot. I don't need a guy to spend a lot. It is not like the guys my age have much money anyway."

Casey 23 - "The simplest answer is No, but now-a days most guys have easy access to viewing the 'bedroom act' and engaging in surface-level relationships through social media, dating apps, and adult sites. Everyone is communicating primarily online. It is like everyone has social anxiety. There is no meeting up to have deep conversations or have romantic dates. There is nothing but 'hook-ups'...For men, there is no need to put in the work to get to know someone. They can just look at images on dating apps, Facebook, and Instagram and decide if who they see is someone they want to talk to more and be physical with or not. Courting has become virtual because no one is meeting in person as much anymore for real dates. Courting to a lot of people is texting/sending pics, fast food, and netflix and chill."

Amber 28 - "It is definitely a NO. I think back in the day, men had to work harder to get or sleep with a woman...But now, everything is hyper-x-rated with those sites and certain apps. It is the norm to hook up with someone and move on to the next person after one night or a few weeks...OR to have multiple options and deal with more than one person simultaneously. People want the quick way. People are stuck on the 'I want it right now', whatever is easiest. Real love, and the work it takes to keep it, is the farthest thing from people's minds it feels like. I think a lot of women want to be courted and taken on dates, but some guys and gals just want to do the bare minimum. They want to skip the traditional dating and come right over to the house for some you know what...and some will ghost you or move on to the next if you say you don't want to. The wait and the 'work' is a turnoff for some guys I guess. They don't put much value on a woman's body because women's exposed bodies are so available and everywhere you look. A committed relationship has too many expectations and guys aren't up for the task it seems. It's sad. Where are the REAL men who respect and appreciate the wait/work??"





Michele 35 - "To be honest, I am wondering if the new generation of guys unlearned or never properly learned how to court. There are men that court out there but seems like slim pickings. No, I'm playing around. I say 'properly learn how to court' because I am used to traditional relationships. Maybe I am old-school or an old soul, but I think it should be a requirement for a man to court his love interest. Women object to double standards and want to be respected even if they choose to be free, fluid, or just do 'it' without commitment...But, the ladies should be objecting to being physical unless they are courted or shown a level of emotional connection and respect. If you want to 'get your fix' as a woman, do it yourself I say. I'd rather do that than lower my standards for a guy. I am absolutely Pro courting and I am also THAT woman who needs the romantic dates before I can even take a guy seriously. Some guys fall off the map because they don't want to invest and court me, and that's okay. I only want the guy who is emotionally available and who has that loving and creative side to plan romantic dates. I am not going to do all the work."





Susanna 42 - "I was in a relationship for many years that ended so I am back on the dating scene now. Yes, I think some guys court and some don't. There are different types of people in the world. I can say from experience, most guys I meet that are around my age will ask me to dinner and to accompany them to interesting events... and I like that. They court me. We can talk, spend time together, and get to know each other. I realize the current culture is that intimacy is not so much 'attained' as it is freely available. That fact makes growing and maintaining emotional connections with someone more challenging. You really have to put yourself out there amidst competition, be open, and trust...along with build up thick skin to disappointment and rejection. Some people have given up the good fight of finding love, but not me. If you want something bad enough, you will work for it until it's yours."

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1 Comment

Jocelyn Ransome
Jocelyn Ransome
Feb 29, 2020

I completely agree with Amber... I believe men just aren't up for the task of committing to a relationship or doing the work. It has become so convenient now to find the easiest thing, that no one considers the actual worth of what they're getting into. No one castes about the person in their life at the time because it is so easy to get access to the next. This has made it hard to commit and really value one person at a time.

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