I asked 5 men and 5 women a series of questions pertaining to
love, hookups, dating, flirting, and more!
Here's what each of them had to say...
LADIES FIRST!!!
Britta- 27 years old
1. Are you single or in a relationship?
In a relationship.
2. When it comes to a guy flirting with you, what style of flirting works best on you? Definitely a combination of a guy who is funny, silly, and nice... but not too passive. I want him to make the first move.
3. Do you have a type?
No type. I just like matching energies. I like more personality than looks. A chill guy that is caring, understanding, and patient is the best for me.
4. If a guy gives you less attention or plays it cool does that make you want him more? Ugh...Definitely not. I will think he is not interested.
5. Who do you prefer to make the first move?
It depends on the situation. If we are with his friends, he should make the first move...and if we are with my friends, I should make the first move and show affection to eliminate any possibility of embarrassment or just an awkward moment.
6. Do you feel like you have to hold back and not show how bad you want him to "get" him? I feel like slightly yes. You shouldn't put all your feelings on hold but you should definitely respect boundaries and not be all in right away. I feel like guys pull away if a girl is too open.
7. Does money matter in a relationship?
To me, money is not a factor.
8. Have you ever been in a toxic relationship and/or felt heartbroken before?
Yeaah, all of them toxic except one relationship, my current one. Yea, to heartbreak too.
9. What is the longest relationship you've been in?
5 years.
10. In your opinion why did your past relationships not work out?
The relationships didn't work because I chose aesthetic over personality and we weren't compatible. I choose differently now. Who they are is way more important than looks.
11. Do you think all men have cheated or will cheat if given the opportunity?
No, well, it depends on the person...not the gender.
12. Have you ever been in a situation where you had to choose between two or more men and had a hard time deciding? No.
13. Not at the same time, but...Do you think people can be happy with multiple different people?- and do you believe in soulmates?
Different people take up different parts of your life, so yes, and I believe in soulmates...sometimes a soulmate can be a friend.
14. When it comes to dating someone seriously, what is the youngest age you'd go for AND what is the oldest?...When it comes to just hooking up with someone what is the youngest age and what is the oldest?
Would seriously date 2 years younger and, hmm, trying to think about older....That is kind of more extendable (lol)... 6 years older probably. For a hook up, 2-3 years younger and probably 8 years older.
15. How long does it take to decide if a guy is just a fun fling or someone worth getting to know more?
I feel like there is no time limit it just depends on the circumstance and how you feel.
16. Do you feel like your parents or society places pressures on you to not be physical with a man too soon?
I feel no pressure at all from society or my parents. It's nobody else's business what I do within my relationships or with my body.
17. What's something a guy did during the early dating stages that was memorable and you felt was special or really interesting?
It was a movie date. We were watching Moana and I cried at the manta ray scene and he wiped my tears away.
18. What is something you did while dating that you thought was going "above and beyond"?
Pretty much letting him use my car whenever he wanted to.
19. Is one of your goals to be married one day?
Hmm, Not a goal to be married. I just need loyalty and commitment. Commitment is commitment, don't need a ring for that...but the party and the dress would be cool.
20. What is one question you'd like to ask men? Or something you'd really like to know:
I honestly don't even know... maybe...Why is it hard to be straight forward?
21. Final Question. There is no right or wrong answer, just your personal opinion: What is your overall view of men?
That's a hard one...It seems like most guys are not true to themselves, they put on a front sometimes just to get what they want. They need to find themselves as men and better themselves before getting involved with someone.
BONUS QUESTION- Does size matter? (*wink)
Uhh that's a hard question...generally yes... if he is bigger it is gonna feel better ...but if I like him and he has other attributes or qualities that balance it out and he knows how to use what he's got..then I'm okay with it. I just know it is scientifically proven that if it is bigger, it feels better! (lol)
Ace- 26 years old
1. Are you single or in a relationship? Single.
2. When it comes to a guy flirting with you, what style of flirting works best on you?
I like a guy that is direct and confident...puts himself out there and is funny and personable. I say don't hold back but be respectful and mature.
3. Do you have a type?
Tall, a six footer, nothing shorter than 5'7 and that's being generous.
4. If a guy gives you less attention or plays it cool does that make you want him more?
I know there's that thing that says women react more if they get ignored but....No, I put in what I get out. So a guy needs to show me he's willing to give me more and put in the work and I'll give. I'll match his energy.
5. Who do you prefer to make the first move?
The guy. If someone is open and vulnerable with me, I will be that with them.
6. Do you feel like you have to hold back and not show how bad you want him to "get" him? No, I like to be completely real and transparent...just be honest, open, and forward.
7. Does money matter in a relationship?
Money can't buy happiness but it certainly helps!
8. Have you ever been in a toxic relationship and/or felt heartbroken before?
Nothing toxic, but it did have highs and lows...and I've been heartbroken before, long story..
9. What is the longest relationship you've been in?
It was a 6-year relationship.
10. In your opinion why did your past relationships not work out?
We just grew apart really... not compatible anymore. That's all.
11. Do you think all men have cheated or will cheat if given the opportunity?
Hahahaa...I mean C'mon.. Unfortunately yes, but I would loovveeee to be proven wrong.
12. Have you ever been in a situation where you had to choose between two or more men and had a hard time deciding?
I had to choose between two people before, yes. The two of them were different but both great. At the time I was just selfish and wanted more. I liked what they both had to offer.
13. Not at one time, but...Do you think people can be happy with multiple different people?- and do you believe in soulmates?
The word soulmates doesn't really resonate with me. I think multiple people have potential to be a good match for you and can make you happy. That's why its possible to find love again with someone else after a breakup.
14. When it comes to dating someone seriously, what is the youngest age you'd go for AND what is the oldest?...When it comes to just hooking up with someone what is the youngest age and what is the oldest?
24 is the youngest and 45 is the oldest...for both dating and hookup.
15. How long does it take to decide if a guy is just a fun fling or someone worth getting to know more?
Well depends on how the first conversation or date goes. It may take only one date.
16. Do you feel like your parents or society place pressures on you to not be physical with a man too soon?
I come from a Hispanic household, very "old school". Sometimes I may hold back because of what society says is appropriate or what mother says, because mother know's best right..It's so hard....Of course I have self-dignity and the little voice telling me if the guy is right or wrong for me. I just know if they are a clown then NO, there are toys for that... I always pause and think before being physical. I'll say this...Maybe when a guy 1st shows interest it might be 60% me thinking about a relationship and 40% let's have fun. I want to know his intentions too so I don't invest time... BUT if he is FINE then the percentage may change (lol).
17. What's something a guy did during the early dating stages that was memorable and you felt was special or really interesting?
This one guy, he had a lot of money and we'd go on fun dates...take trips, go to grand hotels, have nights out on the town...parties, I even met a celebrity. I eventually cut him out though, it just wasn't working.
**There was also a guy who did not have much money but what he did was memorable to me too. He really paid attention to my interests. I love plants and he and took me to the local botanical garden. It didn't cost much and I loved it!
18. What is something you did while dating that you thought was going "above and beyond"? Dealing with their mother...
19. Is it one of your goals to be married one day?
Married?--A loose yes. Yes, for sure at some point, but I'm not fixated on it right now... just taking it as it comes.
20. What is one question you'd like to ask men? Or something you'd really like to know... How can women tap into men's emotional, vulnerable, and empathetic side that we really want to see more of?"
21. Final Question. There is no right or wrong answer, just your personal opinion... What is your overall view of men?
I think men should truly honor and respect women and see how valuable they are.. Empathy is important too. That's not so much how I view men currently, but it is wishful thinking.
Josalee- 24 years old
1. Are you single or in a relationship? I'm Single.
2. When it comes to a guy flirting with you, what style of flirting works best on you?
I'm shy and cynical so I want a guy to be friendly and a little bit of humor is nice too. I want to feel comfortable enough to open up.
3. Do you have a type?
Tall..and I don't know any other word besides STACKED- Just fit and/or husky, strong build, nice, sensitive and quirky. I don't even go for 6 foot anymore because guys lie on their dating profiles, so I gotta see at least 6'2"
4. If a guy gives you less attention or plays it cool does that make you want him more?
No. I like when he shows he is into me. Not obsessed because that's a turn off. I am flattered if I get a lot of attention, but I may say for him to step back a bit if it's annoying.
5. Who do you prefer to make the first move?
I'm too shy to tell I'm interested or how I feel first so I would probably drop hints, let him figure it out.. or wait for him to make the first move.
6. Do you feel like you have to hold back and not show how bad you want him to "get" him? Yes.
7. Does money matter in a relationship?
Umm--they have to earn some type of income. As long as they have a job and make enough money to take care of themselves that's good. If they can take care of themselves and me that's even better.
8. Have you ever been in a toxic relationship and/or felt heartbroken before? Haaahahahahahaaaa...when ever have I not?! Everyone has toxic tendencies. It seems like everyone has trauma and baggage that they bring into relationships whether it is from past heartbreak or from childhood issues or their upbringing. It is like healthy relationships are rare or something..that is just in my experience. I think they need some of your Self-Evolution Life Coaching!
9. What is the longest relationship you've been in? Longest was 4 years.
10. In your opinion why did your past relationships not work out?
Because there was lack of communication and just a lot that was not being brought to light. He was unhappy but kept it to himself until he just decided to leave when he found someone else that he was interested in.
11. Do you think all men have cheated or will cheat if given the opportunity?
sigh..Not all of them but the majority of them. Some have been raised well and had a good father figure to tell them what's what. If they don't experience that education from dad or whoever..and don't learn that cheating is bad and being honest and faithful is good then they may be prone to cheat. Also if they have no self restraint or discipline they'll cheat.
12. Have you ever been in a situation where you had to choose between two or more men and had a hard time deciding?
YES! That is normal, especially for younger people who are talking to or dating more than one person. One was more of love and friendship with one guy and the other was a strong lust and passion for the other, but I wasn't ready to give one up even though I needed to.
13. Not at one time, but...Do you think people can be happy with multiple different people?- and do you believe in soulmates?
I do believe in soulmates, because I have met mine before...but you don't necessarily need to be with your soulmate to be happy. Different people can make you happy in different ways. That is why it is important to date different types of people to see what you like and what type of relationship brings you the most joy.
14. When it comes to dating someone seriously, what is the youngest age you'd go for AND what is the oldest?...When it comes to just hooking up with someone what is the youngest age and what is the oldest?
22 is the youngest ..but even then I probably wouldn't take him THAT seriously ..because 22 is so young. I assume they haven't matured at that age, so probably if they were older it is better. The oldest would be 10 years older than me. For hook ups, age 21-35.
15. How long does it take to decide if a guy is just a fun fling or someone worth getting to know more?
3 days or less really. Definitely within the 1st week. I can tell if it is going to work pretty quickly. I will know if you are not my type of person.
16. Do you feel like your parents or society place pressures on you to not be physical with a man too soon?
There's a certain social standard but I feel like many people aren't genuine especially in this tech world. They live behind a mask.
17. What's something a guy did during the early dating stages that was memorable and you felt was special or really interesting?
Just when personalities click instantly- it's a standout.
18. What is something you did while dating that you thought was going "above and beyond"?
Giving him money or paying his way for things when he had his own money. When the guy has a job but allows the woman to pay for him and does not reciprocate, that is a Big NO!
19. Is it one of your goals to be married one day? Yes, definitely.. Marriage and kids.
20. What is one question you'd like to ask men? Or something you'd really like to know... Why are you so afraid of showing and saying how you really feel?
21. Final Question. There is no right or wrong answer, just your personal opinion... What is your overall view of men?
They are used to treating women a certain way--a lot of times as objects-- and too many are not taught they right way to behave with women.
Cali- 32 years old
1. Are you single or in a relationship? In a Relationship
2. When it comes to a guy flirting with you, what style of flirting works best on you?
I love when a guy is funny, but not too obnoxious...and not a forced funny, trying to be over the top...just naturally funny and also kind.
3. Do you have a type? I had a hard time dating because I care more about personality and character than how hot a guy is. My type is someone with a good sense of humor, spiritual, well mannered, good hygiene, smart, driven, good with money, wants kids, loves pets.
4. If a guy gives you less attention or plays it cool does that make you want him more?
No, I associate that behavior with immaturity. If you are interested, show me. Don't be scared. I'm not attracted to fearful men.
5. Who do you prefer to make the first move? The man...but I am not against making the first move, and I have before.
6. Do you feel like you have to hold back and not show how bad you want him to "get" him?
In any new relationship there is some holding back, in the sense that you don't share all information and every little thing there is to know about you on date 1. I think that is natural and okay. Not every person is going to be "The One", so ease into it... get to know someone gradually and protect your heart, you know.
7. Does money matter in a relationship? Of course. Security is important. I don't expect someone to be rich. Even if he makes only $60-70 K, at least have your own sh!t, be responsible enough to make moves to earn money to support yourself independently. It matters to have financial intelligence too...know how to make money, save it, invest it.
8. Have you ever been in a toxic relationship and/or felt heartbroken before?
Yes, one toxic relationship...Very intense and passionate, but we hurt each other too much..maybe we were not compatible. I just know we fought a lot. That relationship ended in tremendous heartbreak.
9. What is the longest relationship you've been in? 8+ years
10. In your opinion why did your past relationships not work out? We hurt each other and never recovered from the betrayals...Trust was gone, but we just stayed together and kept hurting each other more...and covering wounds with band-aids. Those band-aids being great sex... which was basically a temporary remedy.
11. Do you think all men have cheated or will cheat if given the opportunity?
Not all, but way too damn many. I blame social media and the internet. Maybe too much temptation and they can't handle it. I don't know, but whatever the reason...cheating is betrayal, and NOT okay in any form.
12. Have you ever been in a situation where you had to choose between two or more men and had a hard time deciding? Yes, I was 19 and confused about who I was and what I wanted. They both were great, and I loved them both. The situation should have never happened and I do wish I had done things a little differently, now that I've learned from it.
13. Not at one time, but...Do you think people can be happy with multiple different people?- and do you believe in soulmates? Yes, life would suck if only one person during your 90+ years of living, God willing, could bring you happiness...and I do believe in soulmates.
14. When it comes to dating someone seriously, what is the youngest age you'd go for AND what is the oldest?...When it comes to just hooking up with someone what is the youngest age and what is the oldest? I'm taken, but if I was single....youngest would be 27 and oldest would be 52. That is for both dating and hookup.
15. How long does it take to decide if a guy is just a fun fling or someone worth getting to know more? Hahaaa, within minutes. It does not take long at all. That's why good first impressions are crucial.
16. Do you feel like your parents or society place pressures on you to not be physical with a man too soon? Absolutely. Those pressures are there...does not mean I always give in to them or abide by certain societal expectations. I am my own person and make my own choices based on how I personally think and feel at the time. I use my moral compass and I have been through enough that I completely trust myself to decide when being physical with a certain person is right.
17. What's something a guy did during the early dating stages that was memorable and you felt was special or really interesting? Hmm, I have not experienced anything really interesting in the early stages. However once I was dating someone exclusively I remember some really fun dates... going to professional sports games, going to the beach, to the aquarium and zoo, fancy restaurants and clubs, playing sports together...I just love a good date... doing something fun with someone you love being around.
18. What is something you did while dating that you thought was going "above and beyond"? I think patience and prioritizing the relationship are essential, but I remember times when I was put before something or someone when it would have been a time when I'd accept not being first priority... and I felt it was going above and beyond..in the sweetest and most cherish-able way.
19. Is it one of your goals to be married one day? Yes, if it is right and if it's the right person. I won't force marriage. Marriage is not in the cards for every person. My real goal is to experience true and unbreakable love, any hopefully marriage follows that.
20. What is one question you'd like to ask men? Or something you'd really like to know...
Probably....Why is it that you don't know what you've got 'til it's gone?
21. Final Question. There is no right or wrong answer, just your personal opinion... What is your overall view of men? Men are starting to lag behind it seems. We see now-a-days women making more powerful strides in the corporate world; women are also starting businesses, and statistically earning more higher education degrees. I think men are falling behind due to identity confusion, which can lead to depression.. or maybe resistance to change. Many men want to stay in or are conflicted by "the box" that their parents or society put them in. They think men have to play a certain role and can adopt only a certain list of characteristics otherwise they aren't men or aren't manly and tough. But, sorry guys...you have to do more besides earn money, drive a car, play and watch sports, and lust over women. Step it up. Evolve. We need you to be MORE... to strive to be better for yourself and for the world. Just sayin'.
Anita- 30 years old
1. Are you single or in a relationship? Happily Single.
2. When it comes to a guy flirting with you, what style of flirting works best on you?
If he initiates great conversation and makes me smile or laugh out loud. If I notice he is intellectual, kind, a helpful guy, and has both manners and respect for women... then I am really into it.
3. Do you have a type?
My type is definitely tall since I am pretty tall. So I'd say 6'2" or taller. I also like guys who are adventurous but also enjoy a quiet and relaxing time in the house.
4. If a guy gives you less attention or plays it cool does that make you want him more? Absolutely not...Show me, tell me, don't give me that school boy you're too cool to open up to me crap because it shows me your are either not really interested, immature, or emotionally unavailable.
5. Who do you prefer to make the first move?
Oh without hesitation, The guy. In the past I have made the first move, because the guy took too long, but then I realized he was immature... so I am thinking that I need a guy to make the first move now so I know he wants me and is potentially more mature.
6. Do you feel like you have to hold back and not show how bad you want him to "get" him? Well, I've noticed some guys like for a woman to be all over them and really into them but others like the gradual build up or the chase I guess. I usually just go with the flow and base it on how I feel. It's hard for me to hold back. If me showing my passion backfires then he's not my person.
7. Does money matter in a relationship?
Yes, but not as much as guys think it does. I want security and to not have the stress of worrying if bills will be paid and if there is enough money left to have fun...but I think guys forget how much fun can be had without spending a lot. Guys who say they don't plan dates because they don't have money is such a cop out. Be creative. A guy who makes sh!t happen regardless is sexy.
8. Have you ever been in a toxic relationship and/or felt heartbroken before?
Yes, and YES. Heartbreak is one of the most painful things a person can experience and it can make even the strongest person never want to open up to fall in love again....but you have to. You have to heal and prep yourself to be open to love.
9. What is the longest relationship you've been in? 6-7 years
10. In your opinion why did your past relationships not work out?
Distance, lack of communication, broken trust after lying and cheating, and differences in how we'd want to raise children.
11. Do you think all men have cheated or will cheat if given the opportunity?
Not all but most. There's just too many testimonials to think otherwise. Men are so weak when it comes to that. I think if a sexy woman was in a g string in from of them, was all over them, and if they were sure they would not get caught then they would dip in and not think twice. Just my honest opinion.
12. Have you ever been in a situation where you had to choose between two or more men and had a hard time deciding?
In a way. In my mind I had to make this tough decision that caused me so much stress but in actuality it was a no-brainer....Be with someone who loves you and you have chemistry and history with, or be with someone who is fun and hot and who makes life seem easy. I should have chosen the one who loved me, but I was a selfish and naive.
13. Not at the same time, but...Do you think people can be happy with multiple different people?- and do you believe in soulmates?
Yes, you see it all the time, people can be happy with more than one person throughout their lifetime, but it is about choosing someone and being committed and not allowing yourself to think about the what if's and 'plenty of options' because that gets you into trouble.
14. When it comes to dating someone seriously, what is the youngest age you'd go-and what is the oldest AND When it comes to just hooking up with someone what is the youngest age you'd go-and what is the oldest?
Seriously? Okay..the youngest would be my age or a year younger and oldest would be 40. If it is just a hookup situation then 25 is the youngest and 55 is the oldest.
15. How long does it take to decide if a guy is just a fun fling or someone worth getting to know more? It takes minutes- 1st impressions hold a lot of weight.
16. Do you feel like your parents or society place pressures on you to not be physical with a man too soon?
There is a double standard that exists. Unfortunately I can't sleep with a guy within the first two weeks of dating and expect a commitment. I wish women could act on all of their feelings without being judged or disrespected. Maybe the climate will change but until then, you have to make em wait at minimum 2-3 months if not much longer if you want a long-term relationship.
17. What's something a guy did during the early dating stages that was memorable and you felt was special or really interesting?
He brought me a bouquet of flowers, then cooked me dinner and we cuddled and watched a movie after. He even gave me a massage. I was so turned on by how loving and romantic he was being that I just pounced on him before movie was over. I think it was probably memorable for him too (*smiles).
18. What is something you did while dating that you thought was going "above and beyond"?
I spent too much time, years, waiting for him to be "ready" for commitment. I sacrificed a lot for the relationship and he gave me bread crumbs and false promises.
19. Is it one of your goals to be married one day?
I was engaged before and that didn't work, so yes, I would love to be married and have a family.
20. What is one question you'd like to ask men? Or something you'd really like to know... Why do some of you have such negative views about women, when women are responsible for the continuation of the human race. Women make up a large portion of your day, your life, your thoughts, and fantasies but still we can't get the credit and respect we deserve..Why?
21. Final Question. There is no right or wrong answer, just your personal opinion... What is your overall view of men?
A world without men would not be fun. We need the balance of men and women. I think men are wonderful and so important, but I also think today's culture of men have more weaknesses than women some of those weakness being a thin skin, a sex drive that can distract them, low emotional intelligence, plus stubbornness and narcissism. Not all---but just waayy too many.
OKAY MEN, IT'S YOUR TURN!!!.................
B- 29- single
1. How would you describe your flirting?
I just try to be around her more socially..you know, and be funny..say a few things to make her smile and catch her attention.
2. Do you have a type? She's gotta be intellectual, stays up on current events, art. I just need her to be able to hold conversation and keep my interest.
3. Is the chase of a woman thrilling to you? Yea.
4. If a lady gives you the cold shoulder or plays coy or hard to get-does that make you want her more? Yess...I'm going through that right now.
5. How do you feel about the girl making the first move? I like it.
6. Do you feel like you have to hold back and not show how bad you want her to "get" her? Yes, DON'T give too much.
7. Do you prefer a stay-at home mom type or a career woman? In this day and age, I think both people need to be working.
8. Does money matter in a relationship? Yes. That is what women care a lot about.
9. Have you ever been in a toxic relationship and/or felt heartbroken before? There's a level to 'toxic' and I've experienced some. I'd rather endure a small amount of toxic than be alone. I can deal with a little bit of toxic if she's bad....and yea to the second part.
10. What is the longest relationship you've been in? 2 and a half years.
11. In your opinion why did your past relationships not work out? Just not ready. It was the wrong time.
13. Have you ever been in a situation where you had to choose between two or more women and had a hard time deciding? Yes, I had trouble choosing before. One I knew a lot longer. History holds weight. There is so much time invested..and comfort and understanding. There is a bond whether it is healthy or toxic...it is still a bond and that is hard to let go of.
14. Not at one time, but...Do you think people can be happy with multiple different people?- and do you believe in soulmates? Yes, you can be happy with different people. That's why it's hard to choose one sometimes, and yea.
15. When it comes to dating someone seriously, what is the youngest age you'd go-and what is the oldest AND When it comes to just hooking up with someone what is the youngest age you'd go-and what is the oldest? Date..21 youngest, 33 oldest. Hookup..19 to 35.
16. How long does it take to decide if a girl is just a fun fling or someone worth getting to know more? Not long at all, a day or two.
17. What is something memorable a girl did during the early stages of dating that you found special or interesting? Her skills in the bedroom.
18. What is something you did while dating that you thought was going "above and beyond"? Helping her with paying some bills when we weren't exclusive.
19. By order of importance, 1 being the most important and 6 being the least, --When it comes to a potential mate, how would you place each of the following:
1. Character and Morals, 2. Body and Physical Attractiveness, 3. Talent and Skills, 4. Mind and Intelligence, 5. Money and Status, 6. Sense of Humor
ANSWER- 2,1,4,3,5,6
20. Is it one of your goals to be married one day? Yes, I would like to be married within 7 years.
21. What is one question you'd like to ask women? Or something you'd really like to know...
Why do you play too much?
BONUS 22 Final Question. There is no right or wrong answer, just your personal opinion... What is your overall view of women? They are sexy as hell and fun. They like to mess with your head.
Jay- 31- single
1. How would you describe your flirting? Probably laid back and passive, but I try to be funny and spark conversation with her.
2. Do you have a type? No type, but I like healthy. Someone who takes care of herself, and has a nice body, but not someone who's body looks like a little boy. Pretty and height can be between 5 ft and 6'5.
3. Is the chase of a woman thrilling to you? No, when I get her its more exciting. I don't like waiting or being strung along.
4. If a lady gives you the cold shoulder or plays coy or hard to get does that make you want her more? No, If a girl gives the cold shoulder I am not interested. I don't want to waste my time, and showing interest is good but I don't like obsessed or clingy.
5. How do you feel about the girl making the first move? I'm okay with a girl showing interest, but I want to make the first move. I don't want a girl to ask me out. I want to ask.
6. Do you feel like you have to hold back and not show how bad you want her to "get" her?
I have to hold back even if I want someone badly. It's like, put your tongue back in your mouth and stop drooling. It is not good to act like you need them.. needy is uncomfortable.
7. Do you prefer a stay-at home mom type or a career woman? It depends. If we have a lot of kids then a stay-at-home type. If no, I'm okay with the career type...I just think if a woman is all about career then she is less likely to have time for me.. But it is fine if she has a job...I just do not want a workaholic for a wife.
8. Does money matter in a relationship? No, it doesn't matter. I think that stability matters. You should be able to provide for her if you want to marry her.
9. Have you ever been in a toxic relationship and/or felt heartbroken before? I've been in one toxic relationship, and I do have doubts about being in a relationship because of past experiences and heartbreak. I am cautious but am open to love.
10. What is the longest relationship you've been in? 10 plus years on and off.
11. In your opinion why did your past relationships not work out? There are multiple reasons, but I think ultimately we just had different values I guess.
12. Have you ever been in a situation where you had to choose between two or more women and had a hard time deciding? No.
13. Not at one time, but...Do you think people can be happy with multiple different people?- and do you believe in soulmates? Not really. And soulmates?...yes.
14. When it comes to dating someone seriously, what is the youngest age you'd go-and what is the oldest AND When it comes to just hooking up with someone what is the youngest age you'd go-and what is the oldest? Dating, 24 youngest and 36 oldest. For hookups...If you look good and sexy and you are good at sex, I don't care. For youngest you'd have to at least be college age or out of college, would be better. I don't want a college girl..most are too young and immature.
15. How long does it take to decide if a girl is just a fun fling or someone worth getting to know more? A couple of dates or couple of days.
16. What is something memorable a girl did during the early stages of dating that you found special or interesting? She made an effort to enjoy the same things I do. One girl played basketball with me.
17. What is something you did while dating that you thought was going "above and beyond"? Definitely talking on the phone for a long time is going above and beyond. I don't like talking on phone.
18. By order of importance, 1 being the most important and 6 being the least, --When it comes to a potential mate, how would you place each of the following:
1. Character and Morals, 2. Body and Physical Attractiveness, 3. Talent and Skills, 4. Mind and Intelligence, 5. Money and Status, 6. Sense of Humor
ANSWER- 1,6,2,4,3,5
19. Is it one of your goals to be married one day? Yes.
20. What is one question you'd like to ask women? Or something you'd really like to know... Why do you start fights for no reason?
21. Final Question. There is no right or wrong answer, just your personal opinion... What is your overall view of women? Women are different from men...and that's a good thing. The feminist movement makes women think that they're the same as men. They think they can do all the things men can and they can't. I think women assume certain things about men too. If a woman thinks she's supposed to act like a man that's not okay. Men should strive to be stable and be able to provide for a family so a woman does not have to.
JB- 21- in a relationship
1. How would you describe your flirting? Passive, I like to observe how she acts first, then I'll talk to her and be funny, charming, and charismatic.
2. Do you have a type? No type. I like all beautiful women.
3. Is the chase of a woman thrilling to you? Naw, I used to chase a lot- but now, I'm like..you show me you want me first.
4. If a lady gives you the cold shoulder or plays coy or hard to get does that make you want her more? No, If a beautiful girl shows she is interested then I'm interested.
5. How do you feel about the girl making the first move? I love it.
6. Do you feel like you have to hold back and not show how bad you want her to "get" her? Yes, even if you want it bad, don't show it... don't try too hard.
7. Do you prefer a stay-at home mom type or a career woman? I mean if I make enough, she can just kick it at home and cook and clean, but I don't mind career type too.
8. Does money matter in a relationship? Yea, definitely.
9. Have you ever been in a toxic relationship and/or felt heartbroken before? No and no, but I have been let down before. I've had doubts and second thoughts with relationships too, but that's normal. No relationship comes without challenges.
10. What is the longest relationship you've been in? Over a year.
11. In your opinion why did your past relationships not work out? Wasn't that serious. I haven't had real serious relationships before the one I am in now. I know my relationship now is good and there must be give and take for it to work.
12. Have you ever been in a situation where you had to choose between two or more women and had a hard time deciding? Naw.
13. Not at one time, but...Do you think people can be happy with multiple different people?- and do you believe in soulmates? Yea, I think so and not sure about soulmates...probably.
14. When it comes to dating someone seriously, what is the youngest age you'd go-and what is the oldest AND When it comes to just hooking up with someone what is the youngest age you'd go-and what is the oldest? Dating, 19 is the youngest and 30 is the oldest. I'd go up to 35 for hookup.
15. How long does it take to decide if a girl is just a fun fling or someone worth getting to know more? Not that long but sometimes it takes months to really get to know a girl and you have to take a chance to see what could happen... it depends.
16. What is something memorable a girl did during the early stages of dating that you found special or interesting? She was really into me and showing a lot of interest.
17. What is something you did while dating that you thought was going "above and beyond"? I usually spend money on a date but with my current girl a spent a lot more than usual.
18. By order of importance, 1 being the most important and 6 being the least, --When it comes to a potential mate, how would you place each of the following:
1. Character and Morals, 2. Body and Physical Attractiveness, 3. Talent and Skills, 4. Mind and Intelligence, 5. Money and Status, 6. Sense of Humor
ANSWER- 1,4,2,3,6,5
19. Is it one of your goals to be married one day? Married yes, maybe in my early 30's.
20. What is one question you'd like to ask women? Or something you'd really like to know...
I don't know. I am going to ask my girl why she can't spend time with me while I'm doing something else..playing a game or something. Full attention has to be on her whole time. (lol)
21. Final Question. There is no right or wrong answer, just your personal opinion... What is your overall view of women? Women are people that NEED attention no matter if its good or bad.
Christopher- 29- in a relationship
1. How would you describe your flirting? I usually play it cool.
2. Do you have a type? No type, but I like straight teeth, put together, manicured. I used to only go for a certain look, but now I'm open. If I was single I'd date Black, White, Asian, Latina...so, yeah.
3. Is the chase of a woman thrilling to you? The chase is thrilling only if there is a chance to get her. No chance, chase is pointless.
4. If a lady gives you the cold shoulder or plays coy or hard to get does that make you want her more? Nah..it's the same level of interest either way. I'd rather her show interest not be cold.
5. How do you feel about the girl making the first move? I prefer if a girl makes the first move, but it's not realistic. Men usually have to move first.
6. Do you feel like you have to hold back and not show how bad you want her to "get" her?
Yeah, just play it cool even if you're really interested.
7. Do you prefer a stay-at home mom type or a career woman? I prefer a career driven woman...it is whatever she wants though. Whatever is going to make her happy. I will support her.
8. Does money matter in a relationship? Yea.
9. Have you ever been in a toxic relationship and/or felt heartbroken before? No, never been in a toxic relationship, and yes to the second part.
10. What is the longest relationship you've been in? 5 years.
11. In your opinion why did your past relationships not work out? The long distance didn't work.
12. Have you ever been in a situation where you had to choose between two or more women and had a hard time deciding? No.
13. Not at one time, but...Do you think people can be happy with multiple different people?- and do you believe in soulmates? Yes, you can be happy with different people, and yes to soulmates.
14. When it comes to dating someone seriously, what is the youngest age you'd go for AND what is the oldest?...When it comes to just hooking up with someone what is the youngest age and what is the oldest? I'd date 24 at the youngest, 35 the oldest...and if it is just a hookup I'd go up to early forties.
15. How long does it take to decide if a girl is just a fun fling or someone worth getting to know more? I can decide in one day.
16. What is something memorable a girl did during the early stages of dating that you found special or interesting? Memorable would be that she made me wait to get her phone number. She gave me her email and we communicated that way for a month before she gave her number. It was different and it interested me.
17. What is something you did while dating that you thought was going "above and beyond"? Just making a lot of changes just to make her happy.
18. By order of importance, 1 being the most important and 6 being the least, --When it comes to a potential mate, how would you place each of the following:
1. Character and Morals, 2. Body and Physical Attractiveness, 3. Talent and Skills, 4. Mind and Intelligence, 5. Money and Status, 6. Sense of Humor
ANSWER- 1,4,2,6,5,3
19. Is it one of your goals to be married one day? Yes.
20. What is one question you'd like to ask women? Or something you'd really like to know...
Why can't you just cool out sometimes?... some things don't even need to be an argument.
21. Final Question. There is no right or wrong answer, just your personal opinion... What is your overall view of women? They drive me batshit crazy sometimes, but I can't live without them.
Don- 27- single
1. How would you describe your flirting? I'll compliment a lady and be sure to give her eye contact. I will just be myself and talk to her maybe ask her out or for her number. I like to make sure I am around her more after that to get to know her.
2. Do you have a type? Beautiful is my type. There's women of all different shades and shapes that I'd like to get at.
3. Is the chase of a woman thrilling to you? Yea, somewhat...if I can tell she is in to me too and eventually she'll give in...But if she's too cold I'm not really into it.
4. If a lady gives you the cold shoulder or plays coy or hard to get-does that make you want her more? Hell no.
5. How do you feel about the girl making the first move? Like she is confident and knows what she wants. I'm not mad at it at all.
6. Do you feel like you have to hold back and not show how bad you want her to "get" her?
No, I show her. I'ma talk to her, touch her, hold her and all that. I'm not clingy or nothing but she won't have any doubts about how I feel about her.
7. Do you prefer a stay-at home mom type or a career woman?
I like a boss woman with goals, but a stay-at-home mom is cool too. If she is at home putting in work and raising our kids that's sexy and I respect that too. I'll just have to make sure I bring home that BAG ($$$).
8. Does money matter in a relationship?
For sure. Woman need security. A lot of fights can happen about bills and money in a relationship.
9. Have you ever been in a toxic relationship and/or felt heartbroken before?
No, had a few bad arguments but nothing crazy...and yea I've been lied to and cheated on before. Most young people go through that at least once.
10. What is the longest relationship you've been in? 3 years
11. In your opinion why did your past relationships not work out? She and her family moved cross country to Cali and I wasn't in the position to move way out there.
12. Have you ever been in a situation where you had to choose between two or more women and had a hard time deciding? Ah man, yea, once. Just young and entertaining multiple options, but feelings got involved and was pressured to choose.
13. Not at one time, but...Do you think people can be happy with multiple different people?- and do you believe in soulmates? Yea, and not really sure about soulmates..probably yea. I'll be optimistic.
14. When it comes to dating someone seriously, what is the youngest age you'd go for AND what is the oldest?...When it comes to just hooking up with someone what is the youngest age and what is the oldest? Hahahaa wow. Ah, probably 21 to 45 for just foolin' around and something more serious would be 24 to 30.
15. How long does it take to decide if a girl is just a fun fling or someone worth getting to know more? Right away for real. It does not take long at all once she starts speaking. There's lots of different type of women. I can tell right away the difference between the girls that are basic and I can't take them seriously or a real woman that carries herself a certain way. Don't get me wrong, I think women are great, beautiful, strong, and intelligent, but there's women that also play too many games.
16. What is something memorable a girl did during the early stages of dating that you found special or interesting? One girl liked going shooting and liked motor bikes and sports so our dates were fun as hell. I also liked that when I got injured playin' ball one girl cooked my favorite foods all week and came over and served it to me dressed in a different lingerie each day..Sheesh.
17. What is something you did while dating that you thought was going "above and beyond"? Taking care of her and her family when they needed help. I spent way too much money...but I loved the girl so I would have tried to buy the moon if she wanted it.
18. By order of importance, 1 being the most important and 6 being the least, --When it comes to a potential mate, how would you place each of the following:
1. Character and Morals, 2. Body and Physical Attractiveness, 3. Talent and Skills, 4. Mind and Intelligence, 5. Money and Status, 6. Sense of Humor
ANSWER- 1,3,2,6,4,5
19. Is it one of your goals to be married one day? Yes, Wife and kids.
20. What is one question you'd like to ask women? Or something you'd really like to know...
Why are you so indecisive and take too much time for everything? When I ask what you want to eat don't take an hour to decide. When I say let's get ready to go out at 8pm...it shouldn't be near 9:30-10 that we are walking out the door. (smh)
21. Final Question. There is no right or wrong answer, just your personal opinion... What is your overall view of women? Con-used to be "guilty until proven innocent" but now I just say they are misunderstood. Pro- so beautiful.. I respect all they do because I see women wearing many hats. I need em in my life.
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